


Guilt and Worry

by scarletvisionforever



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-10
Updated: 2016-05-22
Packaged: 2018-06-07 12:12:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6803632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scarletvisionforever/pseuds/scarletvisionforever
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>-THIS STORY CONTAINS CIVIL WAR SPOILERS-</p><p>After Civil War, Vision is feeling confused and alone, but mostly he is missing someone who means a lot to him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

All Vision could do was stare at a wall and twirl the little chess piece from the board in front of him in his hand. There was nothing else. No other way to occupy his time. The person he used to spend all his time with was now in prison. And chances were that he was never going to see _her_ again. He was just going to have to live with his recent mistakes and blunders, and hope one day that she would be released from the Raft and come back to him. 

For hours, Vision sat alone in the common room, thinking about her. He missed her smile, and her laugh, and the way she would look at him while he spoke. He missed her Sokovian accent, and the way she would blurt out Sokovian curse words whenever she got angry. He missed her hugs, and her company, and well, everything else about her. He wanted nothing more than to be able to see her once more. Just so he could tell her he was sorry again, so she truly knew how bad he felt for the way he treated her not so long ago. 

"Hey Vision," Natasha said, walking into the common room and sitting down across from him. "Are you just going to hold that piece or are you actually going to play chess?"

Vision looked up at Natasha, unsure what to say. He gently placed the piece back where he belonged and folded his hands on his lap. "I did not have a partner, so I was unsure whether or not to play."

Immediately, Nat sensed his discomfort. It wasn't her he wasn't comfortable around, but he was just uncomfortable with the situation they were all in. She was too, but she couldn't tell him that. "If you want, I will play with you." Vision wasn't usually her first pick for someone to hang out with, but he was her only choice at the moment. Tony and Rhodey were the only other two in the building and they were busy, so she couldn't really speak to either of them. So Vision was her only option. Plus, she wanted someone to talk to. Usually she didn't like talking, but after all that had happened, she felt it might be better to chat with someone in order to get her mind off of it all. It seemed Vision needed someone to chat with as well. 

Vision shrugged. "Thank you for your offer, Miss. Romanov, but I think I will have to pass. I have too much on my mind to focus on a game."

"I can tell. I don't think you are alone, Vision. Everyone here is going through a difficult time." 

He shook his head. "Yes, I can agree with that. But I do believe that I am carrying much more..." He had to pause for a moment to think of the word. "Guilt, Miss. Romanov. I am carrying quite a bit of it at the moment."

Nat raised her brows and crossed her arms, leaning back on the chair. "Don't you think Tony is feeling the same way?"

"I am aware Mr. Stark is experiencing similar things, but he did not paralyze a teammate. I did, due to my own faults." He frowned and turned his head downwards to face the floor.

"I think Tony is feeling the same amount of guilt for what happened to Rhodey, so that isn't on you. I think there is more to this than that, isn't there?" 

Vision sighed quietly. "I do not wish to talk about this, Miss. Romanov."

"I wouldn't usually be saying this, but I think you do need to talk about this." She had never seen Vision so distraught in all the time she had known him. He was always curious or happy, but now, he just seemed sad and nothing else.

Vision hesitated for a long time, leaving the room in a dead silence. He didn't want to talk about this, but maybe he did  _need_ to. He always told Wanda that talking about her feelings was the best thing to do when she was upset. Of course, he had found it on the internet, so he wasn't entirely sure if it was true. But it always seemed to work for Wanda. And at the end of her venting, she would usually give him a hug, so that seemed to be a good sign every time. 

"I am feeling very conflicted, Miss. Romanov. And I am also confused." 

"Why?" 

"Because, my friends are in jail, and I helped to put them there. Also, one of my other friends is paralyzed. He will never be able to walk on his own again because I was distracted by a new feeling."

"I helped put them there too, that's not on you. It's on all of us. But it's also on them. They didn't sign, despite the many chances they were given. They knew the consequences of their actions before they acted. You cannot blame yourself for that." She sat up and shrugged a bit. "And as for Rhodey.. I think all you need to do is apologize. He is understanding, he will forgive you." 

He shook his head. "I don't think he will, Miss. Romanov. I do not have a good enough excuse to cover up for my blunder."

"Oh yeah? What is your current excuse then?"

Vision hesitated again. Should he really be telling Natasha all of this? "I was distracted."

"By?"

"A feeling."

"What kind of feeling?"

"I am not sure. It was new, and a little bit scary. But it made me feel.. warm, I suppose." 

"What were you doing when you had this feeling?" Nat had a guess at what this was, but she didn't want to get ahead of herself. She wanted to hear what Vision had to say first.

Vision took a deep breath. "I was holding Miss. Maximoff, and apologizing to her for keeping her in the facility." 

Nat nodded. "Just as I expected."

"What is it that you expected?"

"That feeling you felt, it was the feeling of love."

"Love?"

She nodded again. "Yes, love. It's a rare feeling, but it's a good one when it comes along. And yes, it sure as hell is distracting." 

"Have you experienced this before?" 

Nat shrugged. "Maybe, maybe not. I am not really sure. I'm not really in tune with my feelings. Most of the time I try to block them out. It helps me get the job done better."

"So if I blocked out this feeling, would I not become distracted anymore?" 

"Do you want to block out this feeling?"

Vision's answer was almost immediate, unlike most of the other things he had been saying before. "No." 

"Then don't."

"But what am I suppose to do with it? Miss. Maximoff is imprisoned. She will never know how I felt. And the chances that she feels the same way for me are extremely slim." 

Nat shook her head. "Nah, don't think that way. I think Wanda was very fond of you. I saw the way she looked at you, you two shared a connection. And if she wasn't feeling love for you, she was definitely feeling something close to it. And whatever that was, it would've developed into love."

"How do you know?"

"I just know." 

Vision glanced away from Natasha. "This feeling of love is making me very concerned for Wanda's well being. I want to make sure she is alright." 

Now it was Natasha who was hesitating to answer. She knew very well what situation Wanda was in right at this moment. The poor girl was in a straight jacket, with a collar around her neck that would shock her if she tried to use her powers. But she couldn't tell Vision that, it would probably freak him out. "You miss her?" 

He nodded and looked back at her. "Yes. I do. I miss her very much. And I am worried the people in that prison aren't treating her as she deserves to be treated." 

Natasha could see the sadness in Vision's eyes. Poor guy, he really was worried sick for Wanda. If only she could do something to help. Maybe she could lift some of the weight off his shoulders. It wouldn't be anything involving Wanda, but maybe she could assist him in apologizing to Rhodey. "Hey. How about we go pay Tony and Rhodes a visit? I think it might be nice if you say something to him. Maybe you can explain what happened." 

Vision wasn't fond of the idea, but it might help get his mind off of Wanda. "Alright. I suppose Colonel Rhodes deserves to know what happened."

"He certainly does." She stood up and gestured for him to follow her. "Come with me."

Vision stood and followed Natasha into Tony's office, where Rhodes was sitting and chatting with Tony. As soon as the two of them entered the room, all things went silent. Tony didn't even have an annoying remark or joke to make. That was a first. 

"Colonel Rhodes, I would like to apologize to you. I am aware my apology will not be enough to repay the damage I have caused, but I would at least like to try. If you do not forgive me, it is completely understandable and I will not blame you in any way."

Rhodey forced a smile and nodded. "Go ahead, Red."

"I am sorry for what I did. I cannot even being to imagine the way you feel. But I do think that you should get an explanation for why I missed Mr. Wilson when I shot my beam into the air. And this time, it is more than just me becoming distracted. Yes, becoming distracted was the main reason, but you deserve to know why I was distracted. I had a feeling." He stopped speaking for a moment when he heard Tony snicker, then continued. "Miss. Romanov has clarified that this feeling was love. Love is a new feeling to me, and I was dazed and confused by it. When I shot to try and get Mr. Wilson off of your trail, I was not focused because I was thinking about love. I know my feelings aren't really a good explanation to my blunder, but it is what happened. You must understand that I am wholly and completely sorry for what I have done to you, and that I will never forgive myself for it." 

Rhodey's fake smiled turned into a genuine one and he stood up the best he could. He had to hold onto the chair behind him as he did so, but he managed. Tony's technology for helping him walk was actually very helpful. Thank goodness it wasn't Hammer Tech he was working for. "Look man, I understand. This sucks, it really does, but at least I'm not dead. I get it, you're new to all these feelings and its all really strange for you. I know you didn't mean for this to happen. You have only ever had good intentions. So I forgive you."

Vision sighed quietly with relief, allowing himself to relax a little. "Thank you, Colonel. That means more than you can imagine to me. I do hope that we can still be friends, and that you will give me a chance to repay you for this debt." 

"Well," Rhodey said with a chuckle, "You can start by telling me who you fell in love with?"

"Please tell me it wasn't a toaster or something," Tony joked, trying to lighten the mood, and also trying to annoy Vision. 

Natasha just rolled her eyes and leaned against the wall. 

Vision didn't want to say anything, but he couldn't not answer Rhodey's question. He owed Rhodey everything. "I believe I fell in love with Miss. Maximoff." He looked at the floor, a little bit embarrassed. 

Rhodey held his hand out and laughed as Tony pulled some money from his pocket and handed it to him. "I knew it."

"You did?"

He nodded and sat back down in his chair sighing with relief once the pressure was lifted off his legs. "Of course I did, everyone did. It was so obvious. She has been your favorite person to spend time around ever since you stepped foot in this facility! And word is, you saw her naked once too."

Vision's eyes widened. "I-i.. may have seen her without any articles of clothing on. But it was not my intention. She had been getting changed for the shower and I phased through the wall because I wanted to show her my new sweater." 

Everyone in the room cracked up, even Natasha. 

"We had a long talk afterwards, and I promised to knock from then on. But.. she is no longer here. So I will never have the chance to knock on her door again." 

With that, the laughter turned into silence and everyone just exchanged sad glances. 

"Mr. Stark, you visited the prison she was being held in not too long ago. Would you mind sharing with me the condition she was in while you were there? I am concerned for her."

Tony didn't want to tell Vision what Wanda's situation was. Now that he knew the extend of how his robo-son felt about the witch, he knew it would just break his synthetic heart. "Vision, I-"

Tony was interrupted by the computer next to him suddenly turning on and beeping. "What the hell?" He shouted turning to the computer and pressing every button in sight to try and turn it off.

Secretary Ross soon appeared on the screen, looking very angry. "Stark! There has been a break in at the Raft prison! All of the ex-Avengers have escaped! Are you behind this?"

Tony scoffed. "Me? Behind this. Nope. Never. Where are they?"

Ross shrugged. "How am I suppose to know, Stark? I want whatever team you have left out looking for them! No delays or distractions! I want them back in this prison as soon as they are found, understand?"

Tony rolled his eyes and turned around to say something to the Avengers behind him, despite the fact that they could obviously hear Ross. As soon as his chair was turned around completely, Vision had begun floating and flew right up through the roof. "Where the heck is he going?"

Natasha shrugged. "I don't know. He didn't say a word."

Vision flew up, out of the facility, and into the sky as high as he could. He looked around the surroundings of the place, almost expecting to see Wanda running towards it or away from it. But she was nowhere to be seen. He was going to have to find her now. And he wasn't going to give up until he did. 

"Wanda," he said into the air, wishing she would hear him, "Where are you?" 


	2. The Beginning

_Six Months Later_

 

Vision had now perfected the art of disguise. It had been especially hard for him because his skin was such vibrant colors, but he had done it. He no longer questioned what he should wear when he left the compound and didn't want to be noticed. He just grabbed his perfect disguise and went. No one even questioned him on the street anymore. He just looked so... human.

He had to admit, several times he had actually considered staying in the human disguise and never taking it off. It was nice not getting weird looks from people or having mothers hide their children behind them when he walked by. Being different really wasn't easy. Everyone just assumed he wasn't affected by the snickers and the shrieks, but he was, and it hurt him deeply. Now though, because of his human disguise, he looked like everyone else and never even earned a second glance from anyone. It was nice for a change. 

Another plus to his human disguise was that he was practically unrecognizable to everyone he knew. Not even Tony could tell it was him unless he spent a good five minutes staring at him. This was perfect for the job he was assigned to. Or well, maybe not assigned to, he picked this job. He made sure that he got this job and wouldn't let anyone else have it. And this job was to locate, neutralize, and bring back Wanda Maximoff aka The Scarlet Witch aka one of the UN's Most Wanted. 

The last two parts of his job didn't matter so much. But the first one, that was important. He had to find her. Merely six months ago, he realized he was in love with her, and now he had to tell her. He could no longer keep all these feelings bottled up inside. 

Everyday he was in that facility, he would be reminded of her. The kitchen would remind him of how they cooked together. Her bedroom would remind him of all the long talks they had together. The training room would remind him of all the times they sparred together and she would kick his ass. The room with the large hole in the ground would remind him of the time they fought right before the war. The common room would remind him of all the times she fell asleep on his shoulder while watching a movie. The yard would remind him of all the times he tried to help her hone her sort-of flying abilities. 

Everything. Everything in that facility took him back to some time he shared with Wanda Maximoff. And then once he was thinking of that memory, he wouldn't be able to get her off his mind. He would think about her smile and her laugh and her beautiful eyes and how soft her skin was. He would think about her accent and her hair and how beautiful she was. 

The love he felt clouded his judgement. His logic was just about useless while he had her on his mind. So he needed some closure. He needed to see her one more time and tell her how he felt. And if she didn't reciprocate those feelings, so be it. But he wanted to at least hear it from her so he could at least try and move on. Until then, he couldn't help but to have this hope that she might love him back. Maybe, just maybe, she was thinking about him all the time too. 

There was no end to it. Wanda Maximoff was everywhere and she was everything. He needed to find her. 

The first place he looked after General Ross assigned everyone to find a specific ex-avenger was Sokovia, or what was left of it. She was not there. The next was Paris, then Lagos, then New York, then Washington DC, then China, then Japan, then England, then Italy, then Russia, and now Wakanda. 

He got through places faster than anyone else. Why? Because he was running a facial recognition on every person he laid eyes on. Not that he couldn't recognize Wanda quickly, but this would be even quicker than just his eyes. Plus, he also ran full body scans on everyone as well. They only took seconds. And this way he would be able to match blood type, size, weight, and height to Wanda as well. She was blood type AB-, a size 2, 120 pounds, and 5'8". Unfortunately, in all the places he had been so far, she was no where to be found. 

He wasn't going to lose hope, though. If he searched the world once and couldn't locate her, he would search the world again. She would turn up. He wasn't going to stop until he found her. 

On the busy streets of Wakanda, Vision was running his facial recognition scan and his fully body scan at the same time. He did it to every woman he laid his eyes on. But even with Wanda being an entirely different race of those living in Wakanda, he still was having no luck finding her. Slowly, he walked on the sidewalk looking at everyone he passed so he could figure out if they were the woman he had spent months searching for, all so he could tell her how he felt. 

Suddenly, while he was walking and not really paying attention to the scans he was running, an little beep started going off in the back of his mind.  _Blood type: AB-._ Okay, that wasn't anything new. It wasn't like being that blood type was rare. Then, there was another little beep.  _120 pounds._ Alright, the odds of finding a AB- and 120 pound woman were significantly low, but that didn't mean it was his Wanda.  _Size 2._ Now Vision's synthetic heart was racing. That was three points out of four. Could it be the one he had been looking to find?  _Five foot, eight inches._ His eyes widened and he stepped closer to the table where this woman was sitting. 

She was wearing a hood so he couldn't see her hair, and her back was to him so he couldn't see her face. He needed to run facial recognition so he could get a confirmation. This could be it, this could be his big breakthrough. 

He walked fast, pushing through a crowd to get to the other side of the table. The woman who was possibly his old friend had sunglasses on and was sipping tea. He was about to run the facial recognition, but then he realized he didn't need to. She was wearing rings on almost all of her fingers. That was Wanda. That was  _his_ Wanda. 

He walked up to her and slowly took a seat in the empty chair at her tiny table. He didn't even know what to say when he saw her. He couldn't get words out of his mouth. 

While he stared at her, Wanda gave him a strange look. "Excuse me, sir," she said quietly, "Can I help you?" 

Vision recognized her voice as soon as she spoke. Oh, how he had missed hearing her voice. He was about to say something along the lines of, 'Has it been so long that you don't recognize me,' but then he realized that he was in his human disguise. So he opened his mouth to say something else, but Wanda spoke first.

"Wait a minute," she said, putting down her tea and leaning in to get a closer look at him. "Vision? Is that you?"

To hear her speak his name was like hearing angels sing. He immediately smiled. "Wanda. It is wonderful to see you again." 

Wanda seemed to be in utter shock. Her eyes kept trailing up and down him. Obviously she was confused about his disguise. 

"It is quite convincing, isn't it? I look human, don't I? Like everyone else. It's easier to traverse the streets while looking like everyone else. If I may ask, how did you recognize me? Not even Mr. Stark could tell it was me." 

At the sound of the word, 'Stark,' Wanda stood up. It hit her right then that he wasn't just here to chat, but to take her back to the Raft. So she took off in the other direction, running as fast as she could away from Vision. 

Vision was distraught by Wanda's reaction. But his sadness wasn't going to keep him from going after her. He had spent the last six months looking for her, and he wasn't about to let her get away now. He stood and changed his density so he was light enough to float. It would be faster to fly than to run. So that's what he did, he flew as fast as he could until he was practically caught up to Wanda. He had ample opportunity to get her right there in the busy streets, but he decided to let her run to somewhere less crowded. He didn't want to draw much attention to them. Or well, more attention to them than they already had on them. 

Once Wanda had found herself an empty lot of some sort, Vision made his move. He swooped down, landing right in front of her, which stopped her short in her tracks. "Wanda, please listen to me." 

Wanda shook her head and began taking steps backwards. She would've run again too if Vision hadn't grabbed her wrist. 

"I am not going to hurt you," he assured her. 

"You are going to take me back! You're going to take me back to that hell!" She exclaimed, the fear she was feeling showing in every word she spoke. 

Oh yeah, she was right. He was suppose to take her back. His mission was to locate, neutralize, and bring back. There was no point in finding her if he wasn't going to do what he was told. 

At Vision's silence, Wanda decided she was going to say a little bit more. "Don't take me back, Vizh," she begged, "Please! They put me in a straight jacket!"

Vision's eyes widened. "A straight jacket?" He repeated quietly.

She nodded. "Yes. And they put a collar around my neck that zapped me if I tried to use my powers. Or sometimes they would just zap me if I moved, only because they were afraid."

"A shock collar?" Now the anger could be heard in his voice. Those people, they took someone beautiful who should be admired for her gifts and locked her up like they would an animal. They treated her as if she were a dangerous criminal and not a hero! He let go of her wrist at that moment and brought his hand back to his side, clenching it into a fist. Never before in his life had he felt such anger. 

Wanda could've run at that moment, but she didn't. She didn't move actually. She could tell that telling Vision how she was treated may have just changed his mind about taking her back. "Vizh?" She said softly, "Are you alright?" 

"I am fine, but the people who treated you like that aren't going to be! I am not going to take you back there, Wanda. I would never do that. I will leave you alone if that is what you want." He changed his density again and floated an inch or two off the ground, ready to leave. Telling her he loved her wasn't even on his mind anymore, now he just wanted to may those who treated her like an animal pay for their mistakes. He wasn't a creature of vengeance, but this affected him deeply. 

Wanda was then the one to reach out and grab his wrist. "Wait! Don't go. Stay with me." 

Vision looked back down at her, anger fading away with those six words that came out of her mouth. "Stay with you?"

She nodded. "Yes, Vizh. I miss you. Life's not the same without you. I want you with me again." 

"You want me? With you?" He lowered himself back to the ground and locked his gaze with hers.

"It's lonely without you," she admitted. Her hand slid from his wrist and down his hand. There was a part of her that was saying that keeping him here would keep him off Tony's side. But the rest of her was saying that keeping him here would provide her with her old friend who she missed dearly. She really did want him back in her life. She hadn't realized what a big part of it he was until after they were separated. 

"I feel the same.." He told her. Any anger, any need for revenge that he was feeling had simply faded away. Looking into her beautiful green eyes once more made him realize why he was really here. Not because the government sent him, but because he loved her. It was why he had vowed to search the whole world to find her. "I have to tell you something, Wanda."

Wanda reached her empty hand for his and took it, stepping closer to him. "Anything, Vizh." 

"At the airport. When we fought. I was holding you, and I was told to shoot Sam out of the sky. Instead, I shot Rhodey because I didn't do any calculations or take any precautions. I realized later on that I was distracted while I took that shot, and that's why I wasn't thinking clearly. I was distracted because of you, Wanda. Because of my feelings for you." 

Vision's words brought a small smile to Wanda's face. "What kind of feelings, Vizh?" 

Vision hesitated a little. He wanted to tell her, but he didn't know exactly how to say it. Maybe there was no poetic way to tell her he loved her. Maybe the feeling was poetic in itself. Well, it was worth a shot. "Love, Wanda. I didn't realize it until that day, but I've been thinking about it ever since. I'm in love with you. I didn't even know I could love, but I can apparently. And you are the one I love."

Wanda stood there, completely in shock. But she didn't really know why she was in shock. She knew what Vision felt for her, she always had. Whenever he let her poke around in his mind she could see it. The love he felt was always there, he just didn't know it. What he also didn't know what that she had been developing feelings for him as well. And maybe now, after all the hell they had gone through, it would be okay to tell him. "You know, Vizh, I think I'm in love with you too." 

Vision wasn't sure it was possible to be as happy as he was at that moment. He never thought he could achieve such feelings of joy. But maybe, like love, more feelings were possible for him than he had initially thought. "Wanda, if it is alright, I am going to kiss you now." 

Slowly, Wanda nodded. "Of course that's alright." She watched as he leaned down a little, but when he was less than two inches from her, she put her hand up to stop him. "Wait, Vizh. I want to kiss  _you."_ She put her hand on his shoulder and then dragged it towards his neck. Soon enough, she found the line where his mask ended, the mask that made him look like anything but himself. It was shocking how such a simple object could make someone as gorgeous as him look like something entirely different. But the one thing a mask could never change were those blue eyes of his. That was what gave him away when she first saw him. 

She slowly pulled the mask off his face, ripping the fake skin away and tossing it to the ground. Soon enough, she could see him again, mind stone and all. He was perfect. "Okay, now you can kiss me."

Without any hesitation, Vision leaned down and pressed his lips to hers, just like all the people in movies did. He moved his hands to her hips and pulled her closer to him so he could kiss her even better. This moment was perfect, even better than he had imagined it to be. When people in the movies said they felt sparks when their lips met their significant other's, he thought it was a lie. Because technically, unless a shock was transmitted between the two people kissing, it was impossible. But it wasn't a physical shock that was felt. No, it was something emotional. Something that told him that this kiss, with this woman in his arms, wasn't going to be their last kiss. But it was going to be the beginning of something beautiful, just as beautiful as her. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope all of those who requested a second chapter to this enjoyed <3


End file.
